Smorgasbord Book Promotions – New Book on the Shelves – #Techno #Thriller What Comes Before (Heirs And Descendants Book 3) by Daniel Kemp

Fun and laughter at the Open Miic Night.——-Someone has a new book to advertise.

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Delighted to share the news of the latest release by Daniel Kemp…a thriller What Comes Before (Heirs And Descendants Book 3)

About the book

Lord Harry Paterson, Sheriff of the County of Yorkshire, is coerced back to work for the British Security Services after witnessing the macabre death of a beautiful, young woman at a grouse shoot hosted by his friend and ex-fellow army officer, Viscount Winston Bottomly.

Unbeknownst to Harry, the woman – the Viscount’s fiancée – had stolen a top-secret file from the French consulate in London, containing information about an innovative encryption method called post quantum signal cryptography. With the power to endanger every communication method in use between allied nations, the document – in the wrong hands – could completely change the balance of power between East and West.

To avoid a technological threat to world safety, Harry is instructed to find the file and…

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What Comes Before

If you have already read about this book being released this week then, please, feel free to disregard the following. However, before you go, this may be of interest to those who find the marketing and promotion of their work anything ranging from tedious to pleasant, or from supercalifragilistic to the full onslaught of extreme forms of self-flagellation.


I’m not ill-disposed to paying individuals or companies who specialise in marketing and promotion if I can afford their prices and feel their efforts may do some good. I don’t know the best places to advertise books. I know of a few FaceBook pages and I’m a tweeter on Twitter, yes, I know, it’s a throat-cutting experience, but I have to do some form of promotion.


I have a brilliant publisher. I owe them a lot. He, and the people in his company, from the editors to the cover designers, do so much for me that I feel as though I must do something in order to repay their faith. So, with that in mind, I set out to explore the internet to find ways to improve on my meagre efforts.


I looked at Goodreads. I then investigated a return to university with the aim of studying whatever language is used on Goodreads, but with the capacity of memory I now have, I estimated it could take as long as six years to understand and retain all that was needed. Needless to say, but I will say, I declined to pay the necessary fees.


I looked at BookBub, quickly deciding the seven hundred and fifty-odd dollars wanted for the genre the book would go into, was far too much of an investment. But, lo and behold, yesterday I received an email from BookBub telling me my book–What Comes Before, has been ‘confirmed’ to be featured on the 11th of January as a New Release, and the notification of that will go to all my 177 followers.


I had an issue over the 177 followers this notification was addressed to, and this is where you too might have an interest. I do not have only 177 followers on BookBub. I have 613 followers and I’m following 677. I sent Bookbub an email asking why there was a discrepancy between the numbers I said I had and the number they quoted. Their answer might surprise you, and may surprise my publisher, if it was they who indeed; did pay.


Hi Daniel,

Thanks for reaching out! We send New Release Alerts to your followers in the US who have opted-in to receive alerts from authors they follow. It looks like you have 576 US followers, however, only 177 of those followers are eligible to receive this alert.

I hope this helps clear things up! Please let me know if you have any further questions.


I’m left with the places I know where I can advertise my wares, amongst the throngs of others, hoping someone might want to read what I write, and perhaps the number of 177 followers opting to receive notifications of my work, is either ‘par’ or under or over the normal going-rate. Perhaps, each one of those sorrowful 177 souls did not see the–opt out button to tick or click.


Whoever it was who is quoted as saying —being happy if just one person read their work, either worked for BookBub, if BookBub existed when Mark Twain was about, or had sold as many novels as Mark Twain eventually did. Because as much as happiness is relative to an individual and quite honestly–I am as happy as anyone could be, I would love my work to be read by millions of readers —- but I might have to settle for just the one. Ah well, I’m happy just writing, I wonder if you knew that.


What Comes Before— The Third Book in The Heir And Descendants Series—

https://mybook.to/HandDSeries

© 2022, Daniel Kemp. All rights reserved.

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WHAT COMES BEFORE

I started to write this particular book in 2019, shortly after the publication of my last one which was the fourth in a series named Lies and Consequences. With that series completed, my mind turned to the first two novels I had written in a series called Heirs and Descendents: The Desolate Garden and Percy Crow, both of these books featured Lord Harry Paterson.

When those first novels were written I had no intention of making them into a four-book series, but with the other one series having four, it seemed logical to complete another two featuring Lord Harry, who is perhaps my favourite protagonist.

I can’t remember the exact chronological order of events that then happened, but suffice it to say my health took an unhelpful hand. Prior to this period of time, I had some issues with my overall well-being but nothing requiring instant attention, that changed with a bang around the time of the year 2020 was just beginning.

I had developed a severe kidney infection that required a stay in the hospital. After a few days of being stretched out on a bed in a ward, and being fed antibiotics, I needed an operation. Not long after having the first operation, it was decided I required a second. Unfortunately, after that second one, when I was at home asleep in bed, I became ill with Sepsis.

I normally live alone, but luckily for me that night my ex-wife was with me and she telephoned for an ambulance, which resulted in me being carried out of my bed by an ambulance driver. I still have no memory of that happening. I was hospitalised for quite some time with this illness which left me feeling severely lethargic, where sleep would overtake any intent to write, or do anything else.

The surgeons had not finished with me! When they deemed I was ‘strong enough to work on again’ I was operated on, this time to remove the cause of what was creating too much calcium in my body. That was the longest operation I had, over four-hours to find the gland inside my throat which, when found, was removed. However, although the calcium problem was solved I was left with the ringing of Tinnitus.

Before those operations I suffered from emphysema, diabetes and angina, with a low heart rate, requiring a pacemaker as well as having three stents around my heart. Still, the main problem affecting me every single day of my life, was spinal stenosis, which made my ability to walk problematic, so much so that nowadays—I don’t.

Now, I bet you’re thinking, well, surely with him being unable to go out, he should have been able to write that book he’s talking about. Yes, that’s what I did. I wrote—and wrote and—wrote. This third book, in what is called the Heirs and Descendants Series, kept my fingers going. It just would not find its own end. Eventually, when the story was finished with me, it was over 650,000 words.

I sent it off to my publisher who, not unreasonably, asked if I could divide the manuscript into two. My initial wish of one title was now impossible. I was left to face the horrible experience of writing not only one synopsis, but two!

I made the adjustments needed, bearing in mind the overall two-book story, hoping ‘What Comes Before’ is enticing enough for readers to want the second book and if they had not read the first two novels; then—maybe, to be sufficently interested to read the complete series.

Of course, only time will tell if I succeeded, but this publication, including the second ‘novel/instalment’ which is with the publishers, has taken a heavy toll on me. It was to be my last addition to the overstocked literary world.

I would cease writing at the age of seventy-three years, having only started to write when I was sixty-three. Ten long years of great pleasure, with a healthy eight fully published novels and two novellas. A fantastic trip around the country signing books for Waterstone’s Bookshop, with the, as then, strong possibility of my debut writing effort becoming a huge budget film. Sadly, for the movie audience, that film never came to fruition.

But, no, destiny was not happy. One day this week fate decided I should take a look at a short story I self-published many years ago, with the idea of developing it into a book. I did look and guess what, yes, I think I will let the story get a hold of me, very soon.

In the meantime, I give you book number three In The Heirs and Descendants Series

https://mybook.to/WhatComesBefore

WHAT COMES BEFORE

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It’s That Time of Year

Ah, well, it’s the 22nd of December. Just three days to Christmas Day. It’s my favourite time of year, but every year it gets me in the way it seems to creep up and before you know it–it’s the 22nd of December with three days to go ’til the Big Day.


All the gifts I wanted to give to others this year have been bought and in the main; given out. I’m all done with the food ordered, already stored, or on the way and I expect I’ll be complaining soon about how many chocolates I’ve eaten or how many ice creams I’ve had. I recently discovered just how good Salted Caramel Magnum ice cream tubs were with their actual lumps of chocolate in them. If you haven’t tried one—don’t if you do you will buy more leaving less for me.


This time of year is many things to many people, but I’m not about to ram down your throat my beliefs and values. They are mine to hold close respecting your right to live your life the way you wish.
All I would like to do now is to wish you all a Very Merry Happy Christmas and a Safe and Rewarding New Year.


Let your imagination run riot and your creativity amaze.

Daniel Kemp

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The Real Sting

The Real Sting

I saw no shapes in the shadows as life passed into death
In recollections I find the strength to take my final breath
But I know that echoes of illusions give stories of their own
And the past of one’s life is the only thing that’s known.


Contours of life corrode slowly leaving memory cells unaware
Of the pain caused through life that left moral sense empty and bare
But the deceit in deception can never be really owned
And the wrongs of the past can never be condoned.


As the blackbird sings of memories to the phantoms of the dark
And there’s no more room on one’s body for another violent mark
So the comfort found in fantasy becomes the only place to survive
Because the real sting of death is only found when one’s alive.


© 2022 Daniel Kemp. All rights reserved

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The Reality Of Love

The Reality of Love

As a drop of water becomes an ocean

And a ripple of water a wave

A heart can never forget

The love that it gave.


As a kiss melts into the memory

And a smile fades from view

A heart can never forget

The love that passed through.


As hope becomes a dream

And that dream faded and died

The heart will always remember

How lovingly it tried.


If love became a reality

But that reality was untrue

Then a heart will never recover

From the love, it once knew



© 2022, Daniel Kemp All rights reserved


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Walking The Dogs

Walking The Dogs

Old Fred had a habit about which few would complain
As a lot of people in his position would do exactly the same.
After waking each morning he’d take his dogs for a walk
And the further behind them the more merrily he did talk.


He would joyfully praise this, he would praise that
So that most of those he passed enjoyed his informal chat.
One day a policeman passed just as Fred burst into a song
The policeman arrested him. Said he was doing wrong!


The stern-faced judge gave Fred a strict dressing down,
But Fred thought he’d said— to always wear a dressing gown.
Now with the dogs on a lead everywhere, Fred goes
He shuns the use of outdoor wear choosing instead his nightclothes.


The next day the same policeman saw him dressed—inappropriately
At least that’s what the chargesheet read, as Fred did see.
The judge was not amused when Fred said he’d heard him wrong
Nor was he laughing when Fred burst into a melodious song.


But the judge was a changed man after he heard Fred sing
He had the voice of an angel, his voice was hypnotising
He put the policeman in the dock and told him to give Fred his coat
Then he ordered Fred to wear it —so he wouldn’t get a sore throat.


Now Fred walks his dogs whilst singing to the stars
In his new coat, he has no use of the weather report charting isobars.
At the other end of town, a shivering policeman was walking along a street
He wasn’t singing, he wasn’t happy. He was looking a bit—-‘downbeat.’


The moral to this tale is one that dogs know only too well
A warm singer dressed in a coat reaches a higher decibel
However, if the singer has a cold he cannot walk any dog
He must stay indoors inhaling steam so his vocal cords don’t clog.

© 2022, Daniel Kemp All rights reserved

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From My Perspective

I have decided to add more strings to my violin, hence what follows is an example of where my mind wanders when it is underemployed, waiting for something.


An impression is a measurement of character based on the single yet complex concept of acceptability.
The assessment of a person based on an abstract concept of acceptability is not wholly impartial. It is influenced by the personal feelings, or taste, of the individual making that instant judgement. Therefore, it is my contention that most of all impressions are worthless.

It would then follows that all forms of criticism are wrong as being acceptable, or not, is nothing more than a form of fault-finding. Which leaves all measurements of social acceptability without any form of value.

But as value is at the very centre of society, so much so that ‘society’ could not exist without some sort of assessment of value, and what society evaluates equates to differing measurements of acceptability; the accepted measurement is therefore not only a fantasy but an upside down mythical one at that. It is without further question, nor debate— topsy-turvy! Thus, what is currently at the top should really be at the bottom and vice versa, what’s at the bottom should be at the top.

~ ~ ~ ~ ~

If any of the above has disturbed your ideal
Then I apologise profusely for how I’ve made you feel
It’s only my opinion, an idea I shaped
When I ran from the mental home and thought I’d escaped
Unfortunately, I was caught and I’ve never been the same
Having to accept their assessment that I’m utterly insane.

© 2022, Daniel Kemp All rights reserved

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The Leaves Of Winter

The Leaves Of Winter

The subtleties of winter blow sullenly on a breeze
Bending blackened branches waving goodbye to their leaves.


Cold are the nights as the sun laments the day
And eerie is the silence when the stars come out to play.


Without heart is that winter with no happiness to share
As your soul is left empty, without hope cold and bare.


© 2022, Daniel Kemp All rights reserved

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Smorgasbord Laughter Lines Extra – December 2022 – Another Open Mic Night with author Daniel Kemp

I hope you enjoy the humour at a Night of Laughter at the Smorgasboard café, hosted by Sally Cronin.

Smorgasbord - Variety is the Spice of Life.'s avatarSmorgasbord Blog Magazine

Author Daniel Kemp has been entertaing us over the last two years and his funnies are always worth repeating this post from November 2020 and head over toDanny Kemp  .. Always a place to find funnies and jokes to cheer you up… plus some satirical political commentary on politicians at home and abroad.

Today some new funnies and some from this year’s archives.

My thanks to Danny for allowing me to raid his Facebook:Danny Kemp

And something a little extra…

During a visit to my doctor, I asked him, ” How do you determine whether or not an older person should be put in an old age home?”

“Well,” he said, “we fill up a bathtub, then we offer a teaspoon, a teacup and a bucket to the person to empty the bathtub.”

“Oh, I understand,” I said. “A normal person would use the bucket because it…

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